Feeling so unsettled

After my last post this is still continuing. I am being baited into fanatically religious arguments that are completely pointless. I know the power lies with me to end it, so I have taken solid steps, by breaking off contact with the person who is doing the baiting.

I'm still feeling excessively yukky about it though. Trying to figure out what is causing this feeling

1. I reckon there's frustration because I lack the ability to get my point across. But on the other hand there is no attempt at understanding from the Point of View of fanaticism, so I shouldn't be surprised. I'm not surprised though I am frustrated.

2. I feel uncomfortable that I share a world, and a group of friends /family where these kinds of believes thrive, and if you have an opposing POV you are described as a heretic or Blasphemer.
- I guess my my problem here is not easily solved as it is a fact that beliefs differ. I'm just constantly angered by the fact that people would much rather point out the differences than look for the similarities.

3. I just don't know how to think about this anymore, and if I should just ignore it.

I'm probably missing the bigger picture. I have dared to challenge someone's beliefs. They obviously hold it very high in their lives, so what else can I expect other than the retaliation and the attempt at them trying to preserve their beliefs to themselves.

I guess if you need that as a beacon in your life then you will fight tooth and nail to hold onto what you think is true, and deny any possibility that it might not be. The other part that grates me is even now, when debating an issue like this I constantly question my Own beliefs. I constantly look for validation. I constantly try and think of it from another perspective.

Allowing frustration

I'm really allowing too much frustration to creep in today. It might just be hormonal, or the start of another hypomanic episode. I've been doing so well for so long it's very frustrating in itself to now be frustrated.

Most of it seems to be around certain repeated issues I'm faced with in the last few days

1. People trying to force their point of view on others.

WTF is up with that? It comes in so many forms and feels like I am just absolutely surrounded with this right now. What happened to freedom to choose, freedom to express, freedom to just friggin be, and enjoy life, and be happy.

Why does it bother you if I choose to do XYZ. I'm not forcing you to do it, as only you now what's good for you. But Please don't try and convince me that your POV is the ONLY valid one.

2. People not taking responsibility for their own choices

I'm sorry if you choose to be negative and then wonder why your life is filled with dreariness, unhappiness and misery then stop blaming everything else. What is this lack of responsibility? If you made a mistake, then take responsibility for it, stop blaming the world, life, illness, fate, God!!! The DEVIL!!!

That's a good way to try and escape your responsibility. Blame it on the Devil and the Evil in the world.

I'm just getting so frustrated even writing about this maybe I should just stop. Hoping this is hormonal and I will find my inner peace again.