Apology

In the spirit of the post I made today. Which was very hard for me, and brought up many feelings I did not want to feel again, I need to post another song.

Music resonates deeply with me. I've loved this song since I heard it while in theatre when Caitlin was born. It was the first time I ever heard it, even though it's probably much older than that.

I used to think this song is about Caitlin, but hearing it today after what I wrote, I now realise this is all about my Husband. That's why it feels like I could have written these words.

So for Arno ( Anton...inside joke to be explained next week ;) )

The Reason- by Hoobastank



Lyrics

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with every day
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you [x4]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

Returning to Joy

I've been having a hard time this week, as was probably quite obvious. Then someone reminded me yesterday to return to my Joy. That has always been music, and I don't know why I keep forgetting it.

So in order to share my Joy.....

I dug up some CD's I hadn't listened to in years and there it was.

This song makes me cry, laugh, and feel more in touch with Agape than anything else I can think of. Close to the emotions felt at the moment of my daughter's Birth, and the moment of looking into my Soul mate's eyes for the first time.

I saw this band live years ago, and it was more of a spiritual experience than I had ever experienced in any other group setting. They constantly remind me of what I have inside myself.

Live- They stood up for love
This is the Live version



Lyrics - from the Album

Naked lovers feel the blood beneath their veins
Electric nerves comunicate
With tiny explosions through our brains
Who is this energy that never left or came?
Give rise to passion the only glory
Of this human story

I give my heart and soul to the one

We spend all of our lives goin' out of our mind
Lookin' back to our birth, forward to our demise
Even scientists say, everything is just light
Not created, destroyed but eternally bright
Masters in everytime lord in every place
Those who stood up for love down in spite of the hate
In spite of the hate

Who put the flower in the barrel of that gun?
Who lit the candle, started the fire,
Burnt down the fortress, the throne?
Who could house all the refugees in a single shack
Or a lowly bungalow?
Who lives in a different dimension, free from the
Struggles we know?

I give my heart and soul to the one

We spend all of our lives goin' out of our mind
Lookin' back to our birth, forward to our demise
Even scientists say everything is just light
Not created, destroyed but eternally bright
Masters in everytime lord in every place
Those who stood up for love down in spite of the hate
We spend all of our lives goin’ out of our mind
They live in the light

We made it to the moon
But we can't make it home
Waitin’ on a rescue that never comes
Made it to the moon
But we can't make it home
Maybe home is where the heart is given up
To the one, to the one

We spend all of our lives goin' out of our mind
Lookin' back to our birth, forward to our demise
We spend all of our lives goin' out of our mind
They live, they

They stood up for love
Stood up for love
Stood up for love
They stood up for love
Stood up for love
Stood up for love

We spend all of our lives goin' out of our mind
Masters in everytime
We spend all of our lives goin' out of our mind
Stood up for love